clara backround

Monday, September 5, 2011

oh, perspective...

hello bloggy friends. it has been a crummy week for adoption news around here. for one thing, we are not...i repeat NOT in ethiopia. not only are we not in ethiopia at this very moment, preparing to bring our daughter home, we have not yet been submitted to the american embassy (the final step in this process) even though attempts have been made several weeks in a row by our agency. this means we have NO idea when we will be in ethiopia to bring ruby home. today i received another call saying that for the third week in a row, we will not be submitted to the embassy AND, Ruby has been admitted to the hospital for the next three days for an invasive TB test. if it comes back clean, we will be submitted next week...a whole month later than it should have been. i literally want to throw things...things that would shatter into a thousand pieces and i am fighting the urge to go stand on my porch and yell and scream at the top of my lungs so that the whole neighborhood can hear...yep, i am at this very moment supressing a full-on temper tantrum, toddler style.

however, deep in the recesses of my mind i am very aware of my need for some perspective. i was fortunate to have lunch (immediately following the crappy phone call) with a dear friend who gently reminded me that we are serving a God who is giving us (his children) all good things, even when it doesn't feel like He is working or even listening to our cries. just as i give good things to my children, so He gives to His children. perspective.

as our adoption process has taken a turn for the frusterating these past few weeks i have received a constant stream of scripture from friends and family who are too loving to just rub my back and feel sorry for me as i cry into my coffee (or on some days, my enormous glass of wine), and so they remind me who's child i am and who's child Ruby is. perspective.

there was also the awesome blog post, written by a friend who i would love to know better, reminding us that if we are looking for God to work the exact way that we want him to, we stand to miss 'walking on the water' miracles, that give us HIS best, and remind us who He is and what He is capable of. perspective.

thank you to all of you who have been offering me healthy doses of perspective all along...i have apparantly been storing it up for this exact moment. thank you for all of your prayers and messages and words of encouragement that let us know that you care about our family...i have honestly been carrying them with me all week, and going back over them today...such gifts!!!

can i ask you to do one more thing for us. with us? we are asking, very publicly, for a miracle (go ahead, think we live in crazyville, i'm cool with it!). please pray with us that our file will be submitted to the american embassy this coming wednesday, sept. 7th. we have been told that it will not happen, and if it doesn't, so. be. it. however, wednesday is not here yet, and our file has not been submitted every week that it was supposed to be, so maybe it will be submitted the one week it's not supposed to be;-)

"i am still confident of this: i will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord." Psalm 27

6 comments:

  1. Will be praying for that miracle with you! We can rest assured God is in control here..... your Ruby will come home and when she does you will look back and see how Gods hand moved and at times seemed to not move......it's all in the plan....
    Carla

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  2. ohhhh, and if I hear loud screaming from your porch, I shall not worry :) but I will come over and encourage you somehow:)

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  3. Dear friend,
    I am sorry that I have been a bit checked out through this most recent part of the Ruby journey. I want you to know that we are still fervently praying (and btw, even people you don't know have been asking about it a lot lately), that you are an incredible testimony, and that its okay to throw a temper tantrum every once and a while if, in the end, you recognize WHO really is in control of all of this. God has been doing incredible things through you, for you, and for RUBY, and He is going to continue to protect her in Ethiopia and when she comes HOME. Thank you for verbalizing your frustration/perspective, and for giving us a chance to pray for this completely perfect miracle! We love you, we love her, and we can't wait until we know she is here!

    Keep trusting... Love you!
    Lynnea

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  4. We will be praying with you Tina. love ya, Noel

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  5. What a perfectly entitled post. God is your strength, my dear. He's strong enough to bring Ruby home, and he's strong enough to weather temper-tantrums :) You know this, and that's what perspective is. Can't wait to hold Ruby SOON.

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  6. Thank you for being honest...
    For giving me a specific way to pray...
    For being you...
    and for being such a good, loving, passionate, caring mama to Ruby. Some day she will read all this and her heart will squeeze in wonder at how much she was loved even before she arrived home.

    Love,
    Jeane`

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